Jumping off th gutter on th 36 inch uni

Jumping off th gutter on th 36 inch uni
+++

or happy invasion day

+++

australia day if u
celebrate these things

+++

i did it
today

jumped off th gutter on th big uni
man

it bounced

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:27:03]
+++
Laurie Anderson (with Peter Gabriel)
'Excellent Birds'
+++

a bit of air hey

+++

th tyre pacard says 32 psi bt
i havent checked it yet

+++

got over confident and tried a drift
in th driveway at home
after th big block

it turned fast
bt

spat me

+++

oh yeah
i fell off

on th big road
doin slaloms

+++

ok blog
u cn laugh at me now

+++

nother bourbon over here
i jumped th big uni

off a gutter and lived to tell th tale

+++

.
.
.



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:30:22]
+++
The Kinks
'Susannah's Still Alive'
+++

i'm still alive

+++

ta

+++

ws a bit worried
th first time u try a new trick

on a diferent unicycle
c'n be dangerous

+++

spun my
shrink

last session
th session before i

said a plane crash
and water i think

course
i got to yack about th crash at heathrow

in th latest session

i guess that ws it i said


wot did i put in last tuesday;s session ?

oh yeah

i spent five whole minutes out of my
one hour session

ravin about sleepin pills

and wot ppl do on em

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:32:48]
+++
Grinspoon
'Railrider'
+++

dunno about ridin rails
bt i;d been readin in th waitin room
sleep sex and
sleep drivina nd

course

i got up th next morning and

saw th news

heath ledger dead and

they all talkin sleepin pills


ws i surprised ?

+++

somethin outta nowhere

lyric

+++

so next session
in two weeks i cn say

u rmember i ws talkin sleepin pills
th day before he karked it

wonder if he'd
taken his pills
and

did some sleep takin pills
wouldnt surprise me

we may never know

+++

shit happens

+++

i like to spin out my shrink
easy fr me

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:35:29]
+++
Queen
'I Want To Ride My Bicycle'
+++

hmm
i keep promising to take one of my uni's
in fr her to see

ridin a 36 inch beast now

th wheel top
higher than my waist

+++

gettin up about
7 outta ten attempts

never stops me though

+++

ya gotta bee commited

to get high enough to pedal off

+++

i've jst come back frm an eight k ride

+++

and jumped off a fuckin gutter
fr th first time

man

+++

i dont mind ya bouncin baby
ya twist heads

mainly mine though

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:38:33]
+++
Jefferson Airplane
'White rabbit'
+++

more air

+++

so i gotta little air
dear diary and

a hot lookin bitch threw me a devil sign

oh and

a couple guys did th same

+++

been off th drugs two months now
or i;d celebrate with a big bong

+++

.
.
.



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:41:08]
+++
Rolling Stones
'She's Like a Rainbow'
+++

sorry blog
i ws off gettin a bourbon

+++

ok
secret men's busines

this invasion day

all trolls cn leave th blog now

+++

have ya seen th lack of beach at surfers paradise ?

+++

regular readers know i failed to do th
ceremony

on my surf unicycle

three months back and
lost my licence tryin to get there

+++

doesnt look like
there's even a beach to ride on on
th low tide

pity hey

+++

ah well

+++

i wont take th big fella into th surf and
th surf unicycle has been pulled down fr bein naughty

cost me my licence

+++

had th bitch strapped into th front seat of th limo and
th 20 inch on th back seat
th 26 and th 24 monoshock jobbie in th boot

spun th cops minds

+++

naturally my new yr's resolution is to
never punt a uni
in their surf again

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:45:24]
+++
George
'Chemical Dreams'
+++

busted dui and

took my drugs

done fr drugs and

speeding

th beach ws callin me


not a good enough excuse
ah well

+++

so they got me
on th mood stabilizin drugs and

my psychic gift still firin but

not really helpin anybody



sitnorm then

+++

not quite four weeks into
breakin in th new uni and

i've jumped it off a gutter


well it does that

doesnt slide real well though
too much grip and

a fuckin big flywheel


th turning circle is shockin

+++

a 29 inch th nxt aquisition i think

maybe that i'll beach

maybe not


my witchdoctor ways

talkin to th land i surf on
may be over

+++

i keep askin th land to pick a
younger model but

+++

i rode a
recumbant bicycle on thursday before hangin off this guys

roof
paintin th edges


bugger took many pics and

it ws fun to ride

+++

highset

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:49:50]
+++
U2
'When Love Comes To Town'
+++

maybe
when i get old and
i cant ride th nastier unicycles anymore i cn
do wot he did and

ride odd bicycles
although

technically it ws a trike

+++

worries me

when th knees give out

+++

i'd go under th knife to get new knees

done it to get new teeth


take em all out

while i'm young enough to heal quickly and


i shouldnt have fought so much when i ws younger

only had 24 left

+++

started savin fr th nxt uni and
bein off th srugs i

am halfway there already

+++

a little aside each week and

+++

i shouldnt have written th
witchdoctor rehab diaries while doin cones



it bit me in th back a month later

+++

go figure
like i didnt see that comin

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:54:10]
+++
U2
'I Will Follow'
+++

it will follow

bein th psychic little witchdoctor i am

+++

spent a month writin my rehab diaries early

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:55:10]
+++
Booker T and the MGs
'Hang Em High (1968)'
+++

very early

+++

ok

+++

cheap and violent reader

+++

get a little white dog up ya

+++

it's lost its edge since
paris started cartin a  little white dog around
we've gone back to

get a big black dog up ya

+++

dear and gentle reader
my shrink is way ahead of u

+++

all those beautiful little coincidences

+++

still
i thhink i ws rabbitin about
sleepin pills


and wot they do to ppl coz


of wot th media said th nxt day

not necessarily


coz of wot really happened

do ya dig ?

+++

i watch th news and

do predictions based on  wot i hear and see


u dig it ?

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 17:59:05]
+++
Violent Femmes
'Lies [Live][#]'
+++

truth

+++

for every action
an equal and opposite reaction

+++

i wouldnt be much of a psychic if
i wasnt rabbitin to my shrink
th day before heath died

sleepin pills

+++

same brand i think
as wot i ws discussin


they should withdraw em frm sale

killin ppl

+++

sleep drivin
sleep sex and

u name it

+++

if U take sleepin pills
religiously

write in yr diary yr takin em
BEFORE ya take em

and religiously check
before doin th same

jst in case u
take em in yr sleep



think safety
i hate th pills

+++

leave a record we cn unravel

+++

a great waste

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:03:45]
+++
Kenny Rogers
'The Gambler'
+++

smile

+++

gamblin with yr life

poppin pills

+++

we'll miss ya man

now fuck off

+++

NEXT


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:04:41]
+++
The Red Hot Chilli Peppers
'Save The Population'
+++

intruded into my therapy session

+++

not supposed to take these things on anymore

never helps anybody


not even me

+++

bt wot if
a fuckin big meteor ws comin

i'd be writin about it before
and th usual 7 days before

+++

least i'd know where to stand

+++

u stand wherever ya fuckin pls
yr death doesnt diminish me

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:08:49]
+++
Regurgitator
'Young Bodies Heal Quickly'
+++

i dunno

+++

a big enough rock
falls out of th sky

+++

we have nothing t fear
except th sky fallin on our heads

+++

leastwise us unicyclists
we're into conquering fear

+++

unicyclists do it with less fear

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:10:10]
+++
Jewel
'I Won't Walk Away'
+++

walk away frm th crash be buggered
get back up on th beast and go again

+++

i fell off doin slaloms
on th big wheel

on th big road

took two attempts to remount and


th guy in th car turning around
flashed me a devil sign and
his passenger th same


thanks

+++

th left knee ws a bit wobbly

7 and a half k's in
not th first rid eof th day

u know


rode th big beast to th pub earlier

+++

always interesting
mounting th thing with
a sixpack of slshin bourbon


in th back pack

putting me off bt

we got up

+++

and back home with it

+++

[th witchdoctor wandered off background singing]

.
.
.

i sing like a chick
wot of it


cunt

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:14:58]
+++
The Kinks
'God's Children'
+++

oops

sorry god

+++

my god is th
land

+++

i'm a  dislexic aethiest
i dont worship dog

+++

'ave ya given us enough rain yet mungrel
th drought nearly over

+++

typical
th witchdoctor of oz retired and

th bloody rain;s came down


it long known i

ws against it raining


work on yr desalinization plants

we're goin to th stars



mungrels

+++

hope yr happy

+++

i havent been approached to take up th job again but

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:18:16]
+++
Metalica
'The Unnamed Feeling'
+++

i did get given free internet again

+++

hmm

+++

i have an unnamed feeling

+++

how many ppl
did i wipe off th face of th earth in
six yrs ont h job

360 thousand


no wonder i'm with a shrink

and in rehab

+++

ptsd and survivors syndrome

no-one who's had th job in th last 200 yrs
lived

+++

we swiped th deatsh of
other ppl's disasters

before they happened

in th best of
evil witchdoctor tradition

+++

and i paid fr it

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:20:42]
+++
Disturbed
'Liberate'
+++

my shrink sessions are interesting

+++

we've barley scratched th surface

still havent touched on

wot i did fr th gypsie mafia fr 17 yrs

+++

he died of natural causes cunt

+++

get over it

+++

wasnt well liked

took a shotgun to th chest and lived

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:22:19]
+++
Blue Oyster Cult
'Dont fear the reaper'
+++

Dont fear the reaper

+++

even fat johnny doesnt know wot i did fr a living

bt he couldnt get a seat with th hitmen


over breakfast at th ekka

+++

he jst paid me
and didnt pay much attention

here
go settle these accounts

ws i a shylock ?

+++

in real life
ya dont carry a gun

th intimdation is
lower than that

+++

black magic

+++

knock on th caravan door

in th back of th carnival and


start with a smile



hi

+++

swims in my head
all th broke cunts i collected money frm

+++

get back in yr box

+++

th dogs are goin apeshit
i'll have to go feed th big black mungrels soon

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:26:19]
+++
The Kinks
'Till The End Of The Day'
+++

it is th end of th day

nearly six thirty

+++

half an hour past their feeding time

"they cn wait"

+++

th sun is still well up and
we got good weather this

invasion day

+++

i'm half white
i celebrate both

+++

wot would u do ?

+++

happy australia day

luv my country


"most of th time"

+++

dont call me monkey if
a punch in th face offends

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:28:42]
+++
City High
'Caramel'
+++

i'm caramel colour

+++

half think i;m white and
half think i'm black

+++

my own half brother

my little brother still confused too



as am i

+++

i could get dna tested bt
there;d still be ppl

call me a coon

+++

it wouldnt change anything

+++

so i'm
proud

to call myself
aboriginal

wanna make somethin of it ?

+++

mungrels

great grandma in holland ws right

th place ws full of savages bt


it;s gettin better by and by

+++

ya dont affect me enough
ya racist cunts

to stop me lovin my home

+++

i celebrate both



invasion day is a sad day

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:32:14]
+++
The Verve
'Catching The Butterfly'
+++




+++
The Guess Who
'Rain Dance                    '
+++

strange

+++

wouldnt play th verve and

didnt time stamp th guess who



i wrote it
it aint supposed to do that

+++
[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:32:21]


ah there it is

+++

ws at th bottom of th page

+++

7 seconds

+++

i think maybe
we had enough rain fr a while kuta

wot say u

+++
.
.
.


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:35:23]
+++
Elvis Presley
'In the Ghetto                 '
+++

as th snow flies

first lyric

+++


hmm

+++

winter rain maybe

i dunno

+++

still summer

+++

open to interpretation

+++

i'll ask again

i think maybe
we had enough rain fr a while kuta

wot say u

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:36:43]
+++
Robbie Williams&Nicole Kidman
'Somethin stupid'
+++

bugger

+++

thought i wiped this


and put in frank sinatra;s version

+++

i wont ask again ok

+++

must be time to front th fridge

.
.
.



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:39:35]
+++
Laurie Anderson
'Big Science'
+++

cant say why
it reminded me to feed th

two black bitches in th back yard

+++

i luv u too

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:40:17]
+++
Moby
'James Bond Theme'
+++

TAASS

+++

i lost my licence to kill and am

waitin for a sign

+++

my shrink doesnt want me to take th job on again

not good fr my health

+++

i know i cn do it bt

that isnt th point

+++

it doesnt carry any immunity frm prosecution and

th days where

u cn drive drunk and stoned

to go punt a unicycle round th town after midnight


singin on strete corners
in th fortitude valley after midnight
chasin smiles on dials as a karma fixup are gone

+++


they drug testing drivers now

+++

without th drugs
my sensitivity is lower

+++

well...

+++


i lost my karma fixup

u tell me

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:43:43]
+++
Righteous Brothers
'Unchained Melody'
+++

singin background with a bunch of buskers
and not fr money

singer of th tribe
literal translation of

kadaitcha man

+++

aboriginal witchdoctor to u

+++

well...

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:44:40]
+++
Bjork(Massive Attack Slow Jungle mix)
'Hyperballad'
+++

th land is insistant

+++

i have to live in this fucked up country

+++

eat and

get around

+++

i need a new karma fixup

thousands of smiles on dials did th job before


made it hurt less anyway

+++


i warned u to

get out of my blog


secret men;s business

+++

specially on invasion day

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:47:15]
+++
Supertramp
'Fool's Overture'
+++

they walked over us
i cant tell u wot th old ghosts have to say

+++

i'm sorry ok

+++


i predict that

kevin rudd will eventually apologise


our pm

for th bad things that happened bt



who would he offer a treaty to ?

+++

not me i'm

half dutch

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:49:14]
+++
Elvis Costello
'Everyday I write the Book'
+++

and i dont write th book
every day anymore

which makes human life more precarious on this planet

strange as it may seem

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:50:12]
+++
America
'A Horse With No Name'
+++

i'm nobody

+++

no matter how big a magic i throw
i'm still nobody

part of th
ancient aboriginal magic is

th power of invisibility

+++


i did it six yrs unseen

pick a younger model

+++

i cant go back to singin on strete corners
in th valley of guts


unrequited sex
and drugs n rock n roll

is fuckin boring

+++

done enough of it
let me retire in peace

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:52:35]
+++
Do Re Mi
'Man Overboard (Remix)'
+++

yeah man

+++

th 36 inch wheel
is too big to stuff thru large crowds

th turning circle too big

+++

th 29 ?
i havent bought it yet


yeah i could broadslide a 29

managed to broadslide th 36 once already


jst gotta pick yr surface

+++

give me a way to do it kuta
i'm in limbo at th moment

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:54:11]
+++
Mamas & The Papas
'Monday, Monday'
+++

monday is
australia day holiday

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:55:10]
+++
Dire Straits
'Private Investigations'
+++

i hope not
a halfway decent private inveestigator could find me

within a week of looking

+++

i'm retired

+++

they say a hitman never retires bt

+++



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:56:26]
+++
Van Morrison
'Moon Dance'
+++

there's always some bastard they need whacked


quietly

+++

someone to drop dead of

natural causes

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:57:14]
+++
10cc
'Art for Art's Sake'
+++

7 days before u croak

i write it down

mention yr name and
th bone of death and

i claim th kill


psychic little fucker i am

+++

and we feel good

well most of us

+++

th witchdoctor dept of
th abo secret service got our kills

+++

i'll wear bad comments fr that one

stiff shit i dont read em


live fr me

not to keep u happy

+++

art for art's sake

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 18:59:27]
+++
David Seville
'I Told the Witchdoctor'
+++

th Witchdoctor
isnt considered wise in this land kuta


just funning with me

+++

more bourbon over here

.
.
.



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 19:01:49]
+++
Disturbed
'Meaning of Life'
+++

i'll get over it

+++

who do want dead ?

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 19:02:15]
+++
Arlo Guthrie
'Ring-Around-A-Rosy Rag'
+++

stick a red flag in frnt of my face

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 19:02:37]
+++
REM
'Everybody Hurts'
+++

hmm

+++

th shrink sessions are helping

although i cant tell her everything

+++

less allergiuc to chicks without th drugs as it turns out

a two edged sword

no pain at all
if i stay bent bt
get off th drugs and

th testicle problem manifests worse

+++

i'm better off now
bt

i dont do my old job anymore

+++


[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 19:04:23]
+++
XTC
'Senses Working Overtime'
+++

sleep safely

+++

it'll all work out
it's all good right

+++

i got some stuff to do kuta

anything else ?

+++

[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 19:06:03]
+++
The Kinks
'Apeman'
+++

yeah ok
now kuta callin me a monkey

+++

later


i ejaculate
therefore i am

.
.
.

paulie the witchdoctor
'the land surfer"
+++
p.s.



[Song data auto inserted by jenny.exe at 19:06:59]
+++
Bullet for my valentine
'ALL These Things i hate'
+++

once more i'll say goodbye to you

first lyric
...
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