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Re: OT -ish should i let him come to my funeral?

Pixie wrote:
> not sure if anyone remembers i was trying to decide whether or not to
> give something to my friend in my will or cut off with them before i
> go so they think i just moved away and lived happily ever after. well,
> i still cant decide (vote now ;) )
>
>  however, im writing my funeral plans and originally NO ONE AT ALL was
> coming. but it came up in conversation and he asked if he could come
> to my funeral, i said no, no one was. he was a bit upset about that
> and i said well, you dont want to remember me like that! but he said
> he wanted to say good bye. SO, do i say he can come to my funeral? tho
> if he wasnt he wouldnt know i was dead. the only other person getting
> a potential invite is the executor of my will. so there would only be
> maybe her and her bf other than him. my friend would be useful in
> cleaning out my home too as he knows what weird shit i have tho i may
> be afraid he many take any left over meds as he has been suicidal
> before. anyway, any idea what to do?
>
> pretend i moved away? or let him be at funeral?

Like everything in life....there's no strict right or wrong here IMHO.
Personally, during the last year or so, since I became very depressed
and not even the shadow of my former self, I preferred to alienate
people I used to like hanging around with.

It may seem kinda awkward behavior, but for me, once I couldn't make
people laugh or enjoy, and since I couldn't be myself no more , so I
preferred to avoid being among them as the *dark odd fellow*.

Also, for practical reasons, as a part of preparing to die, my personal
POV is, that it would be easier to disconnect in advance, as to avoid
the heartaches from both ends, and also to make sure nobody plays the
hero rescuer all of a sudden, even if out of good will and vibes.

As for this particular friend of yours Pixie, it really depends how
close is he to you.I would not like people to see some private stuff
about the way I lived my life the last year or so and to be remembered
in the light of those things.But it's a personal decision of course.

And... last but not least,if the fellow is suicidal, whatever you do
should be reconsidered in the light of this fact.

John

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