• Als Spam markieren
• Beitrag melden

• 
  Diese Gruppe Alles

• Archiv
• RSS-Feeds

• Kontakt
• Hilfe
• Impressum
• Datenschutz

Re: last night -- long, sorry long

On Mon, 22 Oct 2007, Baba Yaga wrote:
> emerging butterfly <michaela_32@hotmail.com> wrote, in
> alt.support.dissociation:
>> On Oct 22, 12:59 am, astri <inva...@example.com> wrote:
>>> On Sun, 21 Oct 2007, Emerging Butterfly wrote:
>>>> On Oct 22, 12:08 am, astri <inva...@example.com> wrote:
>>>>> On Sun, 21 Oct 2007, emerging butterfly wrote:
>>>>>> On Oct 21, 10:53 pm, astri <inva...@example.com> wrote:
>>>>>>> On Sun, 21 Oct 2007, Emerging Butterfly wrote:
>>>>>>>> On Oct 21, 9:46 pm, astri <inva...@example.com>
wrote:
>>>>>>>>> On Sun, 21 Oct 2007, Emerging Butterfly wrote:
>>>>>>>>>> On Oct 21, 8:17 pm, astri
<inva...@example.com> wrote:
>>>>>>>>>>> On Sun, 21 Oct 2007, emerging butterfly
wrote:
>
> replace spoiler.  bit spoiler for psych-type nastiness.
>
>>>>>>>>>>>> T
>>>>>>>>>>>> H
>>>>>>>>>>>> I
>>>>>>>>>>>> S
>>>
>>>>>>>>>>>> IS
>>>>>>>>>>>> A
>>>>>>>>>>>> S
>>>>>>>>>>>> P
>>>>>>>>>>>> O
>>>>>>>>>>>> I
>>>>>>>>>>>> L
>>>>>>>>>>>> E
>>>>>>>>>>>> R
>>>
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>>>>>>>>>> **
>>>>>>>>>>>> *
>>>>>>>>>>>> **
>>>
>
> [big snip]
>> yeah. like if i just did this one thing, it'd be okay. like i'm
>> choosing to be in pain, and if i would just do xyz....like the pain
>> isn't warranted. like i don't think or try to get myself out of it.
>
> & when one does do xyz, help self little bit can, they decide distress
> isn't real and take help away.  force one unsafeness.
>
> think wallow, won't help.
>
> try hard wallow, won't help.
>
> bad be hurt.  bad need extra help.

:(

>>>> (maybe is a pride thing)
>>>> i did respond nicely at the time, n said, "No, but maybe I should
>>>> get some", etc. etc.
>>>
>>> taking care of her?
>>
>> self-protection, more like. when feeling cornered or misunderstood,
>> i get very submissive and agreeable and pretend to be helped by what
>> other person says...so they'll like me more or something. or so
>
> Yes.
>
>> they'll back the f*ck off of the stupid suggestions. don't want to
>
> Too.
>
> Is not right, you treated like that.
>
>> sound defensive or prideful. don't want to get angry and be labeled
>> histrionic or borderline or something. the good agreeable patient
>> who's sensible enough to be helped so the helper can feel good!
>
> Yes.  Exactly.
>
> Is about their feel good.  Them do making better.  Not make better
> easy, get defensive-angry-mean, all is fault, not try.
>
> Is here http://isnt.autistics.org/dsn-staff.html, "Criteria for Staff
> Personality Disorder".

this is wonderful

>> i was tired of beating my head against walls trying to explain to
>> her what was happening. i realized she was useless to me, so just
>> agreed to make the conversation shorter. no sense fighting what
>> can't be fought.
>>
>>>
>>>>> could she have been hoping to interrupt that somehow?
>>>
>>>> probly. i don't know why it upsets me.
>>>
>>> too simple?
>>> too impersonal?
>>
>> yeah.
>> definitely impersonal.
>
> Yes.  Is you come unperson.

or start unperson

> [**humungous snip]
>
>>>>> is very important to have very good grasp of own stuff
>>>>> and not to be easily triggered
>>>>> and to be very good at observing self
>>>>> and understanding self
>>>>> before trying to do counseling
>>>>> especially with folks with similar issues
>>>
>>>> yes
>>>> and still easily triggered
>>>> often able to suspend when in helping role, though
>>>
>>> this can be deceptive
>>
>> ahh. like i could be responding based on the triggers, but not be
>> aware, which can be more dangerous than knowing one is actively
>> triggered, yes?
>
> Yes.  Very much so.
>
> (BDDT.  Wise Woman get us in those situations.  She not see trigger,
> she do helping, us trigger, dangerous other people.)

regrets

-- astri

=====================
to email send to astri
=====================
at volcano dot org
=====================

Antworten