Re: Time to fix my roof...

Ethan39 (qwe123546789@yahoo.co.uk) writes:
> bc461@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Eleonore Beaudoin) wrote in
> news:gfnink$f96$1@theodyn.ncf.ca:
>
>> Ethan39 (qwe123546789@yahoo.co.uk) writes:
>>> bc461@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (Eleonore Beaudoin) wrote in
>>> news:gfme9c$lvd$1 @theodyn.ncf.ca:
>>>
>>>> Ethan39 (qwe123546789@yahoo.co.uk) writes:
>>>>> ...too much acid rain coming inside my house :(
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> How is that going...?
>>>>
>>>>
>>>
>>> it was more like an artistic expression, i had a case of bad energies
>>> coming down on me :(
>>
>>
>> Thought so, which is why I made the question vague, so it could apply
>> both to first and figurative degrees.
>>
>> Time to see your energy person, maybe?
>>
>> Or did you already;-)
>>
>>
>
> Hehe, no, not yet, but I''ve been reading about aura's and things this
> week. I dunno if I have to get into this anyway. It's seems too out of
> this world for me.
>
> This is what I've been reading:
> http://www.kheper.net/topics/subtlebody/BAB-cosmic.html
>
> But at first I believed someone could actually clean your aura. So I let
> her just do what she could. :) BUt I tried many things, in the new age
> scene, so to speak. Tried things like massages, tarot readings, Tai Chi,
> yoga etc. I also went to a accupunturist, a shaman, lightworkers (they
> clean aura's). I kinda got obsessed with it, never having a clue what I
> was wanting to gain in doing that.
>
> And i associate this with negative memories of that period in my life,
> where I left my gf, lost my house, my job, etc.
>
> Then I decided to step out of the new age scene, and wanted nothing to
> do with it. Then i did nothing my life, and decided to have a group
> therapy in regular healthcare.
>
> So sometimes I think it's best to not have anything to do with new age
> things.
>
> But reading about sveral types of bodies one might have, Buddhist
> believe in this too, it still is interesting. I'm a practical person, so
> while it is interesting to read that thoughts for example are really
> things on aother plane and they want to be materialized, what can i
> possibly do with that knowledge?
>
> Maybe it's nice if you want to be a wizard. :))
>
> So, lots of knowledge is available, but my point is, what can i do with
> it anyway? Maybe i just shouldn't.
>
> And to see my energy person, :), again, I know after a while she will
> start about auras and things again. And I am opening pages in the book
> of life way too often backwards. :) I know I want an explanation for
> everythign that went wrong back then, but I also know I will probably
> never know.
>
> Also, these psychic ppl, seem to know things about my deceased father
> etc. and talking to a picture of him doesn't help in anyway. They says,
> oh he is still with you in your aura! Like, why does he want to, if he
> is a spirit, he can move away, he had his life on earth, why be with
> with me all the time. She suggested talking to a picture of him would
> help him/me. (though i never asked why/what/how) And she was saying
> negative things about him, see was seeing that in my aura probably.
>
> Oh well...I like to forget about this. I can't even watch tv shows with
> psychics anymore. Like Derek Ogilvie from Scotland and Char from the US.
>
> Why they all come to Holland to do tv shows? Are we ppl that like to
> beleive everything?? They are people who use techniques, there's lot to
> read about it on Wikipedia. ANd most of the time ppl just forget what
> information they themselves give to the medium. But the medium claims
> he/she gets the information from the spiritual world/deceased ppl. And
> the fact is, that it takes years of practice to do it in a way most ppl
> wbeleive they are actually getting the info from dead ppl.
>
> One technique is called cold reading:
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cold_reading
>
> And sometimes they ask general questions like: Did your father have
> trouble with his heart? So many older people have heart problems, so
> it's likely a person will say yes. But these questions are often fired
> upon a person really quick after another. So, the psychic notices body
> language etc, to see if he's getting close to the truth. ANd the client
> will only remember afterwards, oh he DID know about that!! Wow, he must
> have special powers!! He really made contact with my father. But because
> they really miss the deceased person, they want to beleive that it is
> possible.
>
> You probably know this already, but i needed to get this off my chest :)


That is quite fine.

he thing with writing or talking about soemthing is that we have to make
sentences: if words are limited, making sentences already requires that we
organize our thoghts in a subjec, verb and complement: beats turnign in
circles without any of those, in our mind, over and over!
Already, by mking sentences, i.e. by talking or writign about soemthing,
we give a direction to our thoughts, and can start friomn there often to
spot what bugs us, what we say that is not ''it'' either, making us look
for what it *is* then, etc.


I have ehard and seen many mnay persons claim they are gifted. G figure
what they mean by that.

But I only ONCE ion my life ran into one that really was giofted. I
therefore can not say it doies not exis, as I happened to be gifted myself
for real*. That made me even more annoyed at the immense number of frauds,
because the very very few of us then get a bad name becase of them.

Usually,. people who either claim to have foudn their goft through New Age
or that embark in the New Age stuff  foud to not be for real. Sometimes
they maybe started froma  real experience or even a real gift, but the
fact that they looked for already made answers instead of having their own
inner temple, reflecting on the meaning of such a thing, and what
responsibilities it entails, or does it, etc, etc, the fact that they just
went with an OUTSIDE trend to graft on the inner gift,, in the case where
there maybe was one to start with, makes it sort of end there.

The quest that starts with molding ourself or our beliefs on soem exterior
movement or belief or religion or dogma makes it so that we no longer seek
our own answers, and no longer have this openng to...what coudl I call
it...The right wave lenght, maybe, or the rigt disposition to receive and
exchange energy.

It was very odd when this person I enpalled wiht at a pont and I realized
the other was for real: neither had ever met anther. He said he had met
such a person only once, and he was younger than me: I never met anther in
my lifetime.....Save him. Not met in eprson, in email. But when we
discorvered we both were for real, immediately ad spontaenoulsy we started
without tryign to compare notes, to be stunned at the resemblances of soem
thigns we lived as far as quetions went, understanding of the world or way
we pervceived the world, etc, which elad us to wonder f there were thigs
kids did that were common to gfted kids, where they then coudl be spotted
easier.



I yet actually had people who could walk to me, a complete tranger to
them, and ask Excuse me...You are a healer, aren,t you?' when I had never
told oen soul and only had worked on animals, cause they coudl not tell
anyone either fear of being spotted and never let in epace is one of the
things I lived and this othe one had as well: wanting to be liek everyoen
else too! When oen is gifted, they live things others do not understand
and can not explain to a child. My parents coudl not ''help me'' in this,
and were intially even afraid of it. Not because it did any bad, it never
did anything bad at all. But because the unkown scares poeple for one
thing, and because whatever seems to defy the rules of hysics, for
example, is just soethign the rbain can not easily compute with. Imagien
the kid that lves that then, wothout guidance!

But exactly, I foudn the gudance to be the reflection and the very
questioning I ahd about this thing hat happened to me that did not to others.

I dream at times of a way to meet others. When soemoen told me there was a
name for those things,. I immediately went ÔYou mean...There are
others???????''. Only as I said, I met fruad after fraud afterfraud after
fraud...yet some ordinary peole, not in New Age or anything, coudl
actually tell I was a healer, whch puzzled me: how coudl they even tell???
I had never told anyoen about it and never thought fo myself as that, in
thsoe days, at all.

Yet maybe 4 times in my life, maybe a bnit more, people walked to me in
situatiosn where oen woud not normally expect this, like in a dancing
place, and ask ÔExcuse me...Are you a healer?' and when  woudl be stubnned
and ask 'What did you just ask me...?' so they woudl repeat, convinced I
heard wrong they woudl tell me to forget it that the must have been wrong
then...Frustrating, when you wanted all your life to meet people that
coudl answer questions or tat lived similar things....To share with them, etc.
But it seems to not work that way:).

One finally told me that he once met a healer in some Island, and that my
eyes were like hers. Whatever that meant.
So anyway. Some are for real. I woudl say those are ...what words to
use...words can be so off in tha area, and many are used in new age that
can be read as having the same meaning woudl I hapen to use one of thse....
But as I used to say to explain it to myself: the goft leads to the giftÔ.
In fact it came back to saying that the guidance to ther gift is...the goft.
If someone uses another outside guidance, like a religion, dogma, etc, or
New Age stuff as their guidance, then they mold the gift to that instead
of lettign t flow from inside towards outside, doing the reverse process:
from the outside dogma towards the inner self....


Some religions say that thetemple is inside each person.

I read this in my maning as meaning that it has to flow from the inside
toards the outside. Not the opposite.

Religions, dogma, Trends, etc, can be means to spirituality or whatever
one woudl want to label whatever it is I mean here:):), they are nto the
end: just A means: not even THE means, as in the only one.


There are really gofted peole. They are extremely rare from my exerience,
as I said.

But every single fraud also sai so. So I feel for people who try and know
which is which!


If a person has an atitude of being a chosen one, an Elected one, a saint,
etc, for being (apparently) gofted, odds are that if they ever were
gifted, they lost it completely.

In fact I oftens ee this as some way the world has to sort thereal and
fraud ones, or those who will go for monmey intead of good, for helping th
neighbor vs beign dulated and admied, etc, etc. If one thnks they are
gofted and from there start trying to develop other gifts, and claim they
so did, rubbish I say. They are a fraud.

Cause again, one that is gifted does not want to believe they are for the
longest time, and when they have blatant reality in their face day in and
day out for many years and hae to consider that what about if they were?,
gain, they react by wanbting to hide it and being NORMAL, like everyoen else.

Anyone who tells me they asked for being gifted and were granted that and
were goft4ed in more and more areas from there one might as well have said
flatly that they are frauds, beacuse that is how I tend to see them, after
having ehard it all too often when it was just fraud too.

It is really odd: as mucha s I was gofted, I m just about the most
disbilieving one about another saygn they are gofted: I know there are
others, of course. But agan, tey are so so so so rarely for real, that
odds are that the oes claiming so are frauds.



Ad of course, I am aware when I write that that my saying I was gifted
can only sound liek all others claiming dso that are frauds. Again, I,d
not want to have to figure out which is which. But nromally within a few
minutes of talking with someone, Ic an know fast of they are frauids.

Takes longer for me to believe they are real.


I can only think of this as an indication of my havig been gofted:
once in this ng, Night-rider/nighthawk anounced that hsi brother died.

I replied to him a long reply. ThenI did many many mnay carriage retrns
and typed in the name of his brother which I never was told. But way way
down where he coudl not see it right away. Tis because I had told him
about his brother when eh died and after, and so he at least coudl hold on
to knowing I was not just making it up, by telling him the first name of
his bro.



I later asked him what the name of his brother ewas. he answered the very
name I had typed in the prior email which he had not happened to see at
the very end of the message, after many epty lines.

I then told him to go check his last mail and see what name I had written
at the very very bottom, way way down after the end of the email body
itself. Sure enough he saw it....: 'Robert'.

I donlt always get names, I don,t alk to the dead day in and day out,m I
sometimes did sense a presence and impressions, etc.
Puttign thsoe into words is not always easy.
here were things in many other areas, mediumnity not be a ncentre of it
all, but nothign is a centre of it all. It is iotsd own thing, and as I
said, the gift leads to the gift, provided that soemoen does not limit it
by sort of relyng on he utside to giove it a meaning it does not have
within itself.

I dunnow hat the gift is, why, ewhy me, why not tis and that one.
I learned that asking myself that finds no answer.


I learned after questioning everything so mnay trimes ver and over and
over...Here is an exmaple: whe with my ex bfriend, I was sick and tired f
the kids m,onaing about my warping utensiles in thse days. I still
occasionally do, never willfull. Happenes. But they were embaraassed
before visitors, when I woudl set the table and minutes after they
realized the spoons and forks or knives were bent or warped, etc.
They would grab them tryng to not attract attention from their guests and
bring them back to me and moan ÔMooo-OOOoom! Stop that!!!!'

But I did not do it on purpose! I therefore did not know how to start nor
STOP it!

It drove me nuts: Was there somethignI was suposed to do that ahd to do
with bending things? Was this soemthign I was supposed to udnersdtand?

After mnay qeeks of constant sef questioning and so on, or even asking my
then bfriend, one evening he saw me very qiet and upset:-What now?
-What &?% use is it?? To bend utenseiles??? I am so mad! If there is
soemthig I am supposed to udnerstand about that, something that I shoud
guess to apply it to, well, I don,t get it!!!!:( And if God wanted me to
be gofted, well, he coudl send the *&?% instruction booklet with it,
there!!!:(:('

I was so angry at it all....Tired of questioning myself to death!

And my tehn bfreind, who had heard me so often say that as much as I then
question myself to death, each tiem I relearn teh asme thing: it is no use
to question. Period:) I get no answers anyway!' , my then bfrend then
answered me perfectly: he was laughing and giggling seing me so mad.
-You find this funny??? Oh, that is funny, right?? Fne, Mr know it all!
YYu tell me!! WHAT good, what use is it, to bend utensiles, huh? What does
it mean??%???
-L:) It means...that it is time you buy a new set, those are all bent by now!
-!!!..:(...mmmppp...mmmpftt mbwahahahahaahahah:)


He did eprfectL he removed the uestioning in the nest way, the very oen I
always ended up finding anyway each time, but ths time savingme more
questioning before I got there and gettign me there on the double: no one
knows what use it is. It just is. Period. If soemthgn comes from that
bending utensiles, in tiem it wil show itself. The goft lads to the goft.
I am not its master, nor is it mine.

Soemoen that woul start telling me what the gift is all about woud
immediately see me try to not sigh and t stay quiet, to not get upset,
bacuse any such person would seem misguiding their own self and
inadvertantly misguiding another....



C



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